How to Seek Protection for Children (Du'aa)

Hisn Al Muslim
Min Athkar Al Kitaab Was Sunnah
by Sa'eed Alqahtani

Ibn AAbbas related that the Messenger of Allah   صلى الله عليه وسلم used to command Al-Hasan and Al-Husayn to Allah's Protection, saying:

OAAeethkuma bikalimatil-lahi-tammah, min kulli shaytanin wa hammah, wa min kulli AAaynin l ammah.

"I commend you two to the protection of Allah's perfect words from every devil, vermin, and every evil eye." 

ما حق الطفل الذى مات بعد الولادة؟

السؤال :- سأل الشيخ محمد صالح بن عثيمين - رحمه الله - عن حق الطفل الذى مات بعد الولادة هل على ذويه  العقيقة؟

الإجابة :- لو أن الجنين قد أكمل فى رحم أمه أربعة أشهر فعلى ذويه العقيقة ثم التسمية لأن بعد الأربعة الأشهر الأولى تنفخ فيه الروح، وكذلك سوف يبعث هذا الجنين يوم القيامة

المرجع :- الشيخ بن عثيمين
لقاء الباب المفتوح الجزء الأول صفحة 47، رقم 74    

 Ummi ترجمة أمى

The rights of the child who dies after birth

Question: If a newborn child was to die right after birth, is the ‘aqeeqah obligatory for him?

Response: If a child is born after the completion of four months (in the mother’s womb), then the ‘aqeeqah should be carried out for him, and (likewise) he should also be named. This is because after the passing of four months, life is breathed into him and (as such) he will be resurrected on the Day of Ressurection.

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen
Liqaa.aat al-Baab al-Maftooh - Volume 1, Page 47, Number 74

Some years ago

Your pretty face came into my life

Years went by

Very hastily

Full of many feelings

Happiness,

Sadness

Disappointment,

Frustration,

From both sides

As a mom 

I want to celebrate your life
Your accomplishments

Your success

Your being close to Allah

Your knowledge of the deen

Your having more fear of Him

Of Allah aza wa jal alone

I want to be proud of You

I want you to be proud of You

I want you to love and respect you

I want you to act upon the knowledge you have

I want that good person inside to wake up

Say I will not follow evil

Say I will not become a member of the shaytan club

Say enough is enough

Say I did a lot of waste

Say now is the time to accomplish

Say now is the time to achieve,

And to reach my goals

Now is the right time

I make duáa for you

Author Ummi

All Rights Reserved ©

Some examples of being dutiful to Parents

Saad bin Abi Waqas (رضى الله عنه) had accepted Islam as a young boy; this disturbed and saddened his mother very deeply because he had given up the faith of his father and forefathers. She tried in many ways to bring him back into the fold of Kufr. When nothing worked she used the last resort of mothers to emotionally blackmail her obedient and loving son. This is something, which makes their determination falter and their resolutions fail. She went on a hunger strike and declared she would not eat until her son came back to the religion of his forefathers. She vowed that rather die than see her son become a Muslim..

Saad bin Abi Waqas (رضى الله عنه) was unnerved when he saw her stubbornness, but pure faith had taken strong roots in his heart, so his strong feet firmly planted in Islam did not totter or shaken. His mother was close to death by starvation and thirst. Displaying strong determination and courage he said to her:
Mother, if you had a hundred lives within you body, and each one of those hundred lives were to leave your body in front of my eyes, even then I would not recant and give up my faith in Islam. It is your wish whether you want to eat or not; as to myself I will not leave my Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم)
 
Seeing that it was of no use and her son was determined, she finished her hunger strike. This resolution and determination of Saad bin Abi Waqas (رضى الله عنه) had been made immortal.

قال الله تعالى فى سُوۡرَةُ لقمَان

وَإِن جَـٰهَدَاكَ عَلَىٰٓ أَن تُشۡرِكَ بِى مَا لَيۡسَ لَكَ بِهِۦ عِلۡمٌ۬ فَلَا تُطِعۡهُمَا‌ۖ وَصَاحِبۡهُمَا فِى ٱلدُّنۡيَا مَعۡرُوفً۬ا‌ۖ وَٱتَّبِعۡ سَبِيلَ مَنۡ أَنَابَ إِلَىَّ‌ۚ ثُمَّ إِلَىَّ مَرۡجِعُكُمۡ فَأُنَبِّئُڪُم بِمَا كُنتُمۡ تَعۡمَلُونَ (15

But if they strive with thee to make thee ascribe unto Me as partner that of which thou hast no knowledge, then obey them not. Consort with them in the world kindly, and follow the path of him who repenteth unto Me. Then unto Me will be your return, and I shall tell you what ye used to do - (15)

من صور بر الوالدين

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

الحمد لله وكفى والصلاة على نبيه الذي أصطفى و على آله وأصحابه و من آثارهم اقتفى .

أما بعد :

فقد أحببت ان أذكر صورا متنوعة من بر الوالدين لما لهذا الموضوع من اهمية كبير وتقصير شديد منا كثيرا ،فبر الوالدين له فضل عظيم، وأجر كبير عند الله -سبحانه-، فقد جعل الله بر الوالدين من أعظم الأعمال وأحبها إليه، فقد سئل النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم:" أي العمل أحب إلى الله؟ قال: (الصلاة على وقتها).
قال: ثم أي؟ قال: (ثم بر الوالدين). قال: ثم أي؟ قال: (الجهاد في سبيل الله)" _[متفق عليه].

وأبدا بذكر قصة الصحابي سعد بن أبي وقاص أحد العشرة المبشرين بالجنة.
هو سعد بن مالك بن أهيب الزهري القرشي أبو اسحاق فهو من بني زهرة أهل آمنة بنت وهب أم الرسول - صلى الله عليه وسلم- فقد كان الرسول -صلى الله عليه وسلم- يعتز بهذه الخؤولة فقد ورد أنه -صلى الله عليه وسلم- كان جالسا مع نفر من أصحابه فرأى سعد بن أبي وقاص مقبلا
فقال لمن معه :"هذا خالي فليرني أمرؤ خاله"

اسلامه

كان سعد -رضي الله عنه- من النفر الذين دخلوا في الاسلام أول ما علموا به فلم يسبقه الا أبوبكر و علي وزيد و خديجةقال سعد : بلغني أن رسول الله -صلى الله عليه وسلم- يدعوا الى الاسلام مستخفيا فعلمت أن الله أراد بي خيرا وشاء أن يخرجني بسببه من الظلمات الى النور فمضيت اليه مسرعا حتى لقيته في شعب جياد وقد صلى العصر فأسلمت فما سبقني أحد الا أبي بكر وعلي وزيد -رضي الله عنهم- ، وكان ابن سبع عشرة سنة كما يقول سعد -رضي الله عنه- :( لقد أسلمت يوم أسلمت وما فرض الله الصلوات ).

يقول سعد -رضي الله عنه- : وما سمعت أمي بخبر اسلامي حتى ثارت ثائرتها وكنت فتى بارا بها محبا لها فأقبلت علي تقول :( يا سعد ما هذا الدين الذي اعتنقته فصرفك عن دين أمك و أبيك؟ والله لتدعن دينك الجديد أو لا آكل ولا أشرب حتى أموت فيتفطر فؤادك حزنا علي ويأكلك الندم على فعلتك التي فعلت وتعيرك الناس أبد الدهر ) فقلت : ( لاتفعلي يا أماه فأنا لا أدع ديني لأي شيء ) الا أن أمه اجتنبت الطعام ومكثت أياما على ذلك فهزل جسمها وخارت قواها فلما رأها سعد قال لها:( يا أماه اني على شديد حبي لك لأشد حبا لله ولرسوله ووالله لو كان لك ألف نفس فخرجت منك نفسا بعد نفس ما تركت ديني هذا بشيء )فلما رأت الجد أذعنت للأمر وأكلت وشربت على كره منها ونزل قوله تعالى :"ووصينا الانسان بوالديه حملته أمه وهنا على وهن وفصاله في عامين أن اشكر لي ولوالديك الي المصير وأن جاهداك على أن تشرك بي ما ليس لك به علم فلا تطعهما وصاحبهما في الدنيا معروفا واتبع سبيل من أناب الي ثم الي مرجعكم فأنبئكم بما كنتم تعملون ".
http://www.ajurry.com/vb/showthread.php?t=16127

Luqmân's Advice to his Son

The Qur’ân contains ten precious advices Luqmân offered his son. Following is the list of this advice offered to Muslim parents, that they may communicate them to their children, family and members of society that they may implement them. If this valuable advise is followed and implemented then we will all be on the straight Path leading to Paradise. Luqmân himself summed up in a few words the way to succîd in this life and on the Day of Judgement.

1. Luqmân warns his son against the greatest injustice man can do. Allâh said that Luqmân said:

"O my son! Join not in worship others with Allâh. Verily, joining others in worship with Allâh is a great injustice indîd." [31:13]

Luqmân calls his son: "My Son". To do so catches his son's attention so that he may listen carefully to his father . Then he calls his son's attention to Tawhid. " Shirk," Luqmân said:" Is a great injustice indeed ".

Therefore, the one who associates others with Allâh in worship does injustice to Allâh, the owner and Creator of the universe. A great injustice is also done to the Mushrik: he subjects himself to Allâh's anger and eternal punishment in Hell.

2. Luqmân reminds his son of the rights of his parents on him,

"and We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and good to his parents. His mother bore him upon weakness and hardship" [31:14]

He describes hardships mothers face bearing children.

"And his weaning is in two years, give thanks to Me and to your parents. Unto Me is the final destination." [ 31:14]

Luqmân mentions the total dependence of infants on their mothers for two years. Thank Allâh, and then your parents . In not, then the final destination is to Allâh.

"And if they both strive with you to make you join in worship with me others that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not, but behave with them in the world kindly." [31:15]

Luqmân tells his son that if the parents are Mushrikîn, then do not follow their way: Allâh's right comes first by far. Even so. for as long as the live, treat your Mushrik parents with kindness.

3. Luqmân then describes some of Allâh's Might.

"O my son! If it be equal to the weight of a grain of mustard seed, and tough it be as a rock, or in the Heavens or the earth, Allâh will bring it forth. Verily Allâh is subtle in bringing out that grain, well aware of its place." [31:16]

Allâh's Knowledge is so perfect that the existence of anything, big or small, is acknowledged and controlled by Him. Luqmân tries to impress his son reminding him of Allâh's absolute control over His kingdom. Such might and power must not be challenged or ignored by anyone.

4. A great advice to Luqman's son is to establish regular prayer, on time and with the best possible performance,

"O my son! Offer prayer perfectly." [31:17]

Prayer is the direct connection between a Muslim and his Creator. Parents must take great care to teach and call upon their children to establish prayer.

5. Luqmân advises his son to "enjoin (people) for good, and forbid from evil." [31:17]

If every Muslim observe this duty , then evil and mischief will have no place in Muslim society.

6. After the useful advice he offered his son, Luqmân recommended patience in implementing them, and in all matters of life,

"And bear with patience whatever befalls you. Verily, these are some of the important commandments ordered by Allâh with no exemption." [31:17]

Patience is a righteous act ordered, and rewarded by Allâh.

7. Arrogance is an attribute of Allâh alone and not for man.

The Creator and Owner of the universe is the only One who deserves to be Arrogant. Allâh threatens arrogant people with punishment in Hellfire. Luqmân said:

"And turn not your face away from men with pride." [31:18]

8. To be moderate is a great attitude anyone can possess,

"Nor walk in insolence through the earth. Verily Allâh likes not each arrogant boaster." [31:18]

Allâh does not like that man is arrogant and proud of themselves.

9. To be moderate in walking and talking is also one of Luqman's advises to his son, "And be moderate (or show no insolence) in walking." [31:19]

Islâm offers a code of conduct in every aspect of life. Even the way Muslims walk and talk are regulated. Islam offers guidelines in this regard that will produce the best behavior and generate respect.

10. Luqmân reminds his son that being harsh while talking will liken his voice to the braying of a donkey. Shouting does not win hearts, rather , it will offend and alienate people,

"And lower your voice. Verily the harshest of all voices is the voice (braying] of an ass!!" [31:19]

Luqmân shows great wisdom in his advice to his son. If Muslims parents take his example, and have their children implement these advises, then by Allâh's permission our Ummah will be successful.

http://islaam.net/

Tags: tarbiyah, qur'an, quraan, learning, knowledge, quran/hadeeth box

Showing Mercy Towards Children is a Means of Achieveing the Mercy of Allah

Showing Mercy Towards Children is a Means of Achieveing the Mercy of Allah

From Umm 'Abdillah Al-Waadi'iyyah's "My Advice to the Women"

From Umm 'Abdillah Al-Waadi'iyyah's "Naseehati Lin-Nisaa' " (My Advice to the Women).   I typed this excerpt from the english translation published by Tarbiyyah Bookstore.  To save time in typing, I omitted the chains of narration for the ahadeeth (but still included all references), as some of them were rather long.  Other than that, I didn't deviate from the translated text, translated by the brother Abul-Layth. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter: Whoever Does Not Show Mercy Will Not Be Shown Mercy (pages 117-122):

Aboo Hurayrah narrated that the Messenger of Allah, salallahu 'alaihi wa salam, kissed Al-Hasan while Al-Aqra ibn Haabis at-Tameemee was sitting near him.  A-Aqra said, "Indeed I have ten children and I have never kissed any of them."  The Messenger of Allah looked at him and said,  "Whoever does not show mercy will not be shown mercy."  [Saheeh al-Bukhaari, 426/10]

From Shaddaad ibn Aws who said that the Messenger of Alah, salallahu 'alaihi wa salam, said, "Verily Allah has perscribed al-ihsaan (excellence) for everything.  So when you kill, you should kill in the best manner.  And when you slaughter, you should slaughter in the best manner.  Let each of you sharpen his knife to provide ease for his animal."  [Saheeh Muslim]

"Al-ihsaan" or "excellence" in the arabic language is procifency in performing an action, while perfecting it with sincerity.  In Islaamic law, Al-Ihsaan is what the Prophet, salallahu 'alaihi wa salam, has explained in his statement:  "That you worship Allah as though you see Him, but since you are un able to see Him, then He most certainly sees you."

Ibn Rajab said concerning the prophetic narration of Shaddaad, "This prophetic narration indicates the obligation of excellence in all of the actions."  [Jami'Al-Uloom 151]

From the types of mercy which can be shown to a child is kissing him:  'Aa'ishah said that a Bedouin man came to the Prophet, salallahu 'alaihi wa salam, and  said, "You (people) kiss the children and we do not kiss them."  So the Prophet said, "Is there anything that I can do once Allah has removed mercy from your heart?"  [Saheeh Al-Bukhari 426/10]

'Umayr ibn Ishaaq said, "I was with Al-Hasan ibn 'Alee when we met with Aboo Hurayrah who said, "Show me where I might kiss you in the place where I saw the messenger of Allah kiss."  He replied, "Al-Qameesah" (shirt or upper garment), He said, "So he kissed the front of his stomach."  [Ahmed with a hasan chain]

From the types of mercy that can be shown to a child is carrying him while in prayer.  Abu Qataadah said that the Prophet, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, came out to us with Umaamah bint Abeel-'Aas on his shoulders.  Then he prayed.  When he bowed, he placed her on the ground and when he rose from bowing, he lifted her back off the ground."  [Saheeh Al-Bukhaari]

On the authority of Abu Shaddaad, from his father, who said that the Prophet, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, came out to us for one of the 'ishaa prayers carrying Hasan and Husayn.  The Messenger of Allah stepped forward and set them both down.  Then he prayed and prostrated between their backs a single prostration that was lengthy.  My (Abu Shaddaad's) father said, 'Then I raised my head and the child was on the back of the Messenger of Allah while he was prostrating.  I then returned to my prostration.'  So once the Messenger of Allah had completed his prayer, the people said, 'O Messenger of Allah, certainly you have prostrated between two backs in your prayer.  Certainly the length of this prostration led us to believe that something had happened or that revelation had decended upon you.'  He, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, said, 'None of that occured, rather this child moved around me and I didn't wish to disturb him until he had finished.'  [hadeeth collected in An-Nasaa'ee, authenticated by Shaykh Muqbil]

From the types of mercy that can be shown to smaller children is playing with them:  Umm Khaalid bint Khaalid ibn Sa'eed said, "I came to the Messenger of Allah, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, along with my father and I was wearing a yellow shirt.  The messenger of Allah said, 'Sanah, sanah!' (this means 'good' in the ethiopian langauge)  Umm Khaalid further said, 'Then I started playing with the seal of Prophethood.  My father admonished me, but the Messenger of Allah said (to my father) 'Leave her.'  The Messenger of Allah then addressed me saying, 'Ablee wa akhliqee, thumma ablee wa akhliqee, thumma ablee wa akhliqee.' (Trans. note: This phrase 'ablee wa akhliqee' is used by the arabs to supplicate for an extended life.  Its meaning could be conveyed in the following expression: 'May you live so long that your garments become worn and ragged.')  So she (Umm Khaalid) remained this way until (this supplication for her became actualized and subsequently) she would be mentioned by the people," meaning that she would remain until her garments became old and ragged.  [Saheeh Al-Bukhaari 425/10]

Mahmood ibn Ar-Rabee' said, "I remember when I was a boy of Five years old, the Prophet, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, took water from a bucket with his mouth (majjatan majjahaa) and threw it in my face." 

Al-Haafidh said, " 'Majj' is the expelling of water from the mouth.  It is said that nothing is refered to as 'majj' except if it is from a distance.   The action of the Prophet, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, with Mahmood was either from his play with him or it was a means of blessing him with it just as he used to do with the children of his companions."

Anas ibn Maalik said, "Certainly the Prophet, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, used to spend time with us to the extent that he even said to my young brother, 'Oh father of 'Umayr, what did the little birdie do?'  "  [Saheeh Al-Bukhaari 526/10]

In addition, from the types of mercy that can be shown to a child is placing the child in one's lap.  'Usaamah ibn Zayd said that the Messenger of Allah, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, used to take me and place me on his thigh and he would place al-Hasan ibn 'Alee on his other thigh, then he would come close to us and say, "Oh Allah!  Please be merciful to them, for indeed, I am merciful to them."  [Saheeh Al-Bukhaari 434/10]

Therefore, this is how one might be affectionate with the smaller children concerning everything they might need or how they might be amused.  This is an appropiate means of showing them mercy and affection, as long as this does not lead towards bringing about improper behavior.

Certainly the Prophet, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, has praised the women of Quraysh because they possessed praiseworthy characteristics and from them is their affection for children.

Narrated upon Abu Hurayrah that the Messenger of Allah, salallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, said, "The best wome to ever ride the camel were the women of Quraysh."  [Saheeh Al-Bukhari 511/9]

He also said, "The most righteous from the women of Quraysh are those who are most affectionate ("ahnaah") to the child during its youth and who are most protective concerning their husband's property."  Al-Haafidh said that "ahnaah" is from affection, which is compassion and tenderness.

The mercy that is shown to the young children and other than them is from the reasons that cause a person to achieve the mercy of Allah. 

It has also reached us from the Prophet, slallahu 'alaihi wa sallam, that he said, "He is not from us who does not show mercy to the young and does not honor the old."

21 Points on Raising Children By Umm ‘Abdillaah al-Waadi’iyyah,

21 Points on Raising Children
By Umm ‘Abdillaah al-Waadi’iyyah,حفظها الله






http://abdurrahman.org/family/21-Points-on-Raising-Children.pdf

Children and the Knowledge of Hadeeth

Muhammad ibn al Husayn ibn al Fadl al Qattaan narrated...that Miskeen ibn Bukayr stated: A man passed by al ‘Amash while he was teaching Hadeeth and said: ‘You are teaching these children?!’
Al ‘Amash responded: ‘These children are preserving your religion for you!’
Al Hasan ibn Abee Taalib informed me that…I heard al Musayyib ibn Waadi’ saying: ‘Ibn Mubaarak may Allaah have mercy upon him, if he saw the children of the people of Hadeeth with pens in their hands he would draw them close and say: ‘These are the seedlings of the religion, we were told that the Messenger of Allaah - صلى الله عليه وسلم – said:

“Allaah continues to plant seedlings in this religion that He supports it with, they are youngsters amongst you today, but they may be the Kibaar [major scholars or elders] after you.”

Muhammad ibn Ahmad ibn Rizq informed us that…‘Abdullaah ibn ‘Ubayd ibn ‘Umayr said: ‘Amr ibn al ‘Aas stood at a circle of knowledge amongst Quraysh and said:

“Why have you discarded these children? Do not do so, make space for them in the circle, let them hear Hadeeth and make them understand it. Indeed they are the youngsters amongst you now, and they will soon be the Kibaar of others. You were once the youngsters of a people, and today you are the Kibaar of your people.”

Muhammad ibn al Faraj ibn ‘Alee al Bazaar narrated to us that…Zayd ibn ibn Ahkzam said: ‘I heard ‘Abdullaah ibn Dawood saying: ‘It is befitting for a man to force his children to listen to Hadeeth.’ He also used to say: “Religion is not by talk, indeed religion is only the Athaar [narrations].”
Muhammad ibn Ahmad ibn Rizq informed us that…an Nadar ibn al Haarith said: I heard Ibraheem ibn Adham saying: ‘My father said to me:

“My son, study Hadeeth, for every time you hear and memorize a Hadeeth I will give you a Dirham.” So I studied Hadeeth upon that.”

 Translator: Abu Abdul-Waahid, Nadir Ahmad

  المترجم :أبو عبد الواحد نادر أحمد

Source: SubulasSalam.com

أطفالنا والمسجد

 

Your Flesh and Blood - The Rights of Children

Shaikh Muhammad 'Umar Baazmool

Al-Ibaanah Book Publishing

Al-Ibaanah.com

About the Book:
This book is a complete translation of the concise booklet “Fildhaat-ul-Akbaad Huqooq-ul-Awlaad” (Your Flesh and Blood: A Lecture on the Rights of Children). The source used for the translation was the 2006 Daar-ul-Istiqaamah Edition. The origin of this publication in the Arabic language was a lecture the Shaikh gave which was then transcribed and published in book format. All quotes and narrations are referenced in the original publication.

Although small in size, this booklet presents the readers with a valuable discussion on some of the rights and privileges of children, which parents are obligated to fulfill. Indeed, it is not only the children who will be asked concerning their behavior towards their parents on the Day of Judgement but also the parents will be asked concerning their children and how they raised them. Therefore, we must know the rights of our children and strive to fulfill our duties towards them so that they in turn may serve as righteous deeds for us and benefit us after we die.

Shaikh Muhammad Baazmool is one of the well known people of knowledge in Saudi Arabia. Currently, he serves as a member of the teachers’ committee in the College of Da’wah and Usool-ud-Deen at Umm-ul-Qurraa University, Makkah, Saudi Arabia. He has authored numerous books and given many lectures, some of which have been transcribed, as is the case with this booklet.

Excerpts from the Book:
“Allaah has given importance to the caring and maintaining of our flesh and blood since their inception – from the time that a Muslim thinks about getting married. The Messenger ordered every youth to strive towards marriage on the condition that he can accommodate a wife, i.e. he has the ability to fulfill the responsibilities of marriage and the obligations of marital life.”

“Thereafter, he (sallAllaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) ordered us to choose a righteous wife. This is since the Messenger informed us of the effect that a person’s immediate family has over him in the narration reported by Abu Salamah bin ‘Abdir-Rahmaan who related from Abu Hurairah that the Messenger of Allaah (sallAllaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said: ‘There is no child except that he is born upon true faith (Fitrah), but it is his parents that make him a Jew or a Christian or a Zoroastrian. Just as an animal gives birth to a baby animal that is whole, do you find it mutilated?’ Then Abu Hurairah recited: ‘…the Fitrah of Allaah which He created mankind upon.’ [Surah Ar-Room: 30]”

“The Messenger of Allaah has instructed us how to expiate this fitnah. Hudhaifah reported: ‘We were sitting one day with ‘Umar when he asked us: ‘Which one of you memorized the words of Allaah’s Messenger concerning trials?’ I replied: ‘I did, just as he said it.’ He said: ‘You are quick to respond!!’ I said: ‘A man’s trials with regard to his family, his wealth, his children and his neighbor are expiated by prayer, fasting, charity, and commanding (good) and forbidding (evil).’”

“A Muslim may work and comply with all of the things (we just mentioned) and ask Allaah for success and assistance. However, what occurs may be something other than what you intended. So you must know that this is part of Allaah’s Divine Decree which He has allowed to occur. Just look at the son of the messenger of Allaah, Nooh, and at how he wasn’t righteous. And look at the wife of Loot who also wasn’t righteous, as well as the wife of Nooh, even though they were married to prophets of Allaah. Allaah says: ‘And Nooh called upon his Lord and said: ‘O my Lord, verily my son is of my family! And certainly Your promise is true, and You are the most just of judges. He said: ‘O Nooh! Surely, he is not of your family. Verily, it is an act that is dishonorable. So do not ask Me about that of which you have no knowledge. I admonish you lest you should be one of the ignorant.’ Nooh said: ‘O my Lord! I seek refuge in you from asking You about that which I have no knowledge of. And unless You forgive me and have mercy on me, I would indeed be one of the losers.’ [Surah Hood: 45-47]”

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Prohibition of Disobeying Parents and severance of Relations

 

Chapter 41

Allah, the Exalted, says:

"Would you then, if you were given the authority, do mischief in the land, and sever your ties of kinship? Such are they whom Allah has cursed, so that He has made them deaf and blinded their sight.'' (47:22,23)

"And those who break the Covenant of Allah, after its ratification, and sever that which Allah has commanded to be joined (i.e., they sever the bond of kinship and are not good to their relatives), and work mischief in the land, on them is the curse (i.e., they will be far away from Allah's Mercy), and for them is the unhappy (evil) home (i.e., Hell).'' (13:25)

"And your Rubb has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: `My Rubb! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young.''' (17:23,24)

336. Abu Bakrah Nufai` bin Al-Harith (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم ) said, "Shall I not inform you of the biggest of the major sins?'' Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) asked this question thrice. We said, "Yes, O Messenger of Allah. (Please inform us.)". He said, "Ascribing partners to Allah, and to be undutiful to your parents". Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) sat up from his reclining position and said, "And I warn you against giving forged statement and a false testimony; I warn you against giving forged statement and a false testimony". Messenger of Allah ( صلى الله عليه وسلم ) kept on repeating that warning till we wished he would stop.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Commentary: This Hadith mentions some of the major sins. A major sin is one against which there is a serious warning in the Noble Qur'an and Hadith. When disobedience to parents is mentioned along with Shirk (polytheism), it makes the fact evident that both of these are very serious sins. Similar is the case of telling a lie and false testimony, which in the incident mentioned in this Hadith made Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) to leave his pillow and sit attentively. It indicates that the latter two are serious. May Allah protect all Muslims from all such sins.

337.  Abdullah bin `Amr bin Al-`as (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, "(Of the) major sins are: to ascribe partners to Allah, disobey parents, murder someone, and to take a false oath (intentionally)".
[Al-Bukhari].

Commentary:  There are many more major sins which have been enlisted and discussed at length by Muhaddathun in independent volumes, such as Kitab-al-Kaba'ir by Adh-Dhahabi. This Hadith mentions some of the major sins enumerated by the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) on a particular occasion. We can also say that the sins mentioned here are some of the most serious among the major sins.

338. `Abdullah bin `Amr bin Al-`as (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, "It is one of the gravest sins to abuse one's parents.'' It was asked (by the people): "O Messenger of Allah, can a man abuse his own parents?'' Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, "He abuses the father of somebody who, in return, abuses the former's father; he then abuses the mother of somebody who, in return, abuses his mother".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Another narration is: Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, "One of the major sins is to curse one's parents". It was submitted: "O Messenger of Allah! How can a man curse his own parents?'' He (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, "When someone curses the parents of another man who in return abuses the former's father; and when someone abuses the mother of another man who in return abuses his mother.''

Commentary:  We learn from this Hadith that one should not abuse anyone's parents, because in the event, he is paid in the same coin, he will be responsible for disgracing his own parents.

339. Abu Muhammad Jubair bin Mut`im (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, "The person who severs the bond of kinship will not enter Jannah".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Commentary: This Hadith poses a serious threat to those who violate the Divine injunctions of maintaining good ties of kinship. In spite of such a serious warning, this major sin is very common in our present-day society. The purpose of this warning is that Muslims prevent themselves from it. May Allah save us from it.

340. Abu 'Isa Al-Mughirah bin Shu`bah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, "Allah has forbidden you: disobedience to your mothers, to withhold (what you should give), or demand (what you do not deserve), and to bury your daughters alive. And Allah dislikes idle talk, to ask too many questions (for things which will be of no benefit to one), and to waste your wealth".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

“Do you think I have paid her back?”

Abdullah Ibn ‘Umar - رضى الله عنه -saw a Yemeni man performing Tawaf (circumambulating the Ka’bah) while carrying his mother on his back. This man said to Abdullah Ibn ‘Umar, - رضى الله عنه - “I am like a tame camel for her! I have carried her more than she carried me. Do you think I have paid her back, O Ibn ‘Umar?” Abdullah Ibn ‘Umar - رضى الله عنه -  replied: “No, not even one contraction!!” (During Labor) [Al Adab al Mufrad Bukhari 1/62]

علموا أولادكم الحب

علموا أولادكم الحب

يبدو أننا فقدنا قدرتنا على معرفة الإتجاه السليم

أراد أحد المتفوقين أكاديميا من الشباب أن يتقدم لمنصب إداري في شركة كبرى.
وقد نجح في أول مقابلة شخصية له, حيث قام مدير الشركة الذي يجري المقابلات

بالانتهاء من آخر مقابلة واتخاذ آخر قرار.

وجد مدير الشركة من خلال الاطلاع على السيرة الذاتية للشاب أنه متفوق أكاديميا بشكل كامل
منذ أن كان في الثانوية العامة وحتى التخرج من الجامعة,لم يخفق أبدا !

سال المدير هذا الشاب المتفوق: "هل حصلت على أية منحة دراسية أثناء تعليمك؟" أجاب الشاب "أبدا"
فسأله المدير "هل كان أبوك هو الذي يدفع كل رسوم دراستك؟" فأجاب الشاب:
"أبي توفي عندما كنت بالسنة الأولى من عمري, إنها أمي التي تكفلت بكل مصاريف دراستي".
فسأله المدير:" وأين عملت أمك؟" فأجاب الشاب:" أمي كانت تغسل الثياب للناس"
حينها طلب منه المدير أن يريه كفيه, فأراه إياهما
فإذا هما كفين ناعمتين ورقيقتين.

فسأله المدير:"هل ساعدت والدتك في غسيل الملابس قط؟" أجاب الشاب:" أبدا, أمي كانت

 دائما تريدني أن أذاكروأقرأ المزيد من الكتب,

بالإضافة إلى أنها تغسل أسرع مني بكثير على أية حال !"

فقال له المدير:" لي عندك طلب صغير.. وهو أن تغسل يدي والدتك حالما تذهب إليها,

ثم عد للقائي غدا صباحا"

حينها شعر الشاب أن فرصته لنيل الوظيفة أصبحت وشيكه
وبالفعل عندما ذهب للمنزل طلب من والدته أن تدعه يغسل يديها

 وأظهر لها تفاؤله بنيل الوظيفة
الأم شعرت بالسعادة لهذا الخبر, لكنها أحست بالغرابة والمشاعر المختلطه لطلبه,

 ومع ذلك سلمته يديها.

بدأ الشاب بغسل يدي والدته ببطء , وكانت دموعه تتساقط لمنظرهما.
كانت المرة الأولى التي يلاحظ فيها كم كانت يديها مجعدتين, كما أنه لاحظ فيهما بعض
الكدمات التي كانت تجعل الأم تنتفض حين يلامسها الماء !

كانت هذه المرة الأولى التي يدرك فيها الشاب أن هاتين الكفين هما اللتان كانتا تغسلان الثياب

كل يومليتمكن هو من دفع رسوم دراسته.

وأن الكدمات في يديها هي الثمن الذي دفعته لتخرجه وتفوقه العلمي ومستقبله.
بعد انتهائه من غسل يدي والدته, قام الشاب بهدوء بغسل كل ما تبقى من ملابس عنها.
تلك الليلة قضاها الشاب مع أمه في حديث طويل.

وفي الصباح التالي توجه الشاب لمكتب مدير الشركة والدموع تملأ عينيه, فسأله المدير:
"هل لك أن تخبرني ماذا فعلت وماذا تعلمت البارحه في المنزل؟"

فأجاب الشاب: "لقد غسلت يدي والدتي وقمت أيضا بغسيل كل الثياب المتبقية عنها"
فسأله المدير عن شعوره بصدق وأمانه, فأجاب الشاب:

" أولا: أدركت معنى العرفان بالجميل, فلولا أمي وتضحيتها لم أكن ما أنا عليه الآن من التفوق.
ثانيا: بالقيام بنفس العمل الذي كانت تقوم به, أدركت كم هو شاق ومجهد القيام ببعض الأعمال.
ثالثا: أدركت أهمية وقيمة العائلة."

عندها قال المدير:
"هذا ما كنت أبحث عنه في المدير الذي سأمنحه هذه الوظيفه, أن يكون شخصا يقدر

مساعدة الآخرين

والذي لا يجعل المال هدفه الوحيد من عمله... لقد تم توظيفك يا بني"
فيما بعد, قام هذا الشاب بالعمل بجد ونشاط وحظي باحترام جميع مساعديه.
كل الموظفين عملوا بتفان كفريق, وحققت الشركة نجاحا باهرا.

الدرس:

الطفل الذي تتم حمايته وتدليله وتعويده على الحصول على كل ما يريد,
ينشأ على (عقلية الاستحقاق) ويضع نفسه ورغباته قبل كل شيء.

سينشأ جاهلا بجهد أبويه, وحين ينخرط في قطاع العمل والوظيفة فإنه يتوقع من الجميع أن يستمع إليه.
وحين يتولى الإدارة فإنه لن يشعر بمعاناة موظفيه ويعتاد على لوم الآخرين لأي فشل يواجهه.

هذا النوع من الناس والذي قد يكون متفوقا أكاديميا ويحقق نجاحات لا بأس بها,
إلا أنه يفتقد الإحساس بالإنجاز,
بل تراه متذمرا ومليئا بالكراهية ويقاتل من أجل المزيد من النجاحات.

إذا كان هذا النوع من الأولاد نربي, فماذا نقصد؟ هل نحن نحميهم أم ندمرهم؟
من الممكن أن تجعل إبنك يعيش في بيت كبير, يأكل طعاما فاخرا, يتعلم البيانو,
يشاهد البرامج التلفزيونية من خلال شاشة عرض كبيرة.

ولكن عندما تقوم بقص الزرع, رجاء دعه يجرب ذلك أيضا.
عندما ينتهي من الأكل, دعه يغسل طبقه مع إخوته.

ليس لأنك لا تستطيع دفع تكاليف خادمة, ولكن لأنك تريد أن تحب أولادك بطريقة صحيحة.
لأنك تريدهم أن يدركوا أنهم - بالرغم من ثروة آبائهم - سيأتي عليهم اليوم الذي تشيب فيه شعورهم
تماما كما حدث لأم ذلك الشاب.

والأهم من ذلك أن يتعلم أبناءك العرفان بالجميل, ويجربوا صعوبة العمل, ويدركوا
أهمية العمل مع الآخرين حتى يستمتع الجميع بالإنجاز

Story Of Appreciation

 


One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.
 
He passed the first interview; the director did the last interview, made the last decision.
The director discovered from the CV, that the youth's academic result is excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never was a year he did not score.
The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarship in school?" and the youth answered "none".
The director asked, " Is it your father who paid for your school fees?" the youth answered, my father passed away when I was one year old, it is my mother who paid for my school fees.
The director asked, " Where did your mother work?" the youth answered, my mother worked as a cloth cleaner. The director requested the youth to show his hand, the youth showed a pair of hand that were smooth and perfect to the director.
 

The director asked, " Did you ever help your mother wash the clothes before?" The youth answered, never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books, furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.The director said, I have a request, when you go back today, go and help to clean your mother's hand, and then see me tomorrow morning.
The youth felt that as the chance of landing the job is high, when he went back, he happily wanted to clean his mother's hand, his mother felt strange, happy but mixed with fear, she showed her hands to the kid.
The youth cleaned his mother's hand slowly, his tears dropped down as he did that.  It is the first time he found his mother's hands so wrinkled, and there are so many bruises in her hand. Some bruises incite pains so strong that shiver his mother's body when cleaned with water.
  
This is the first time the youth realized and experienced that it is this pair of hand that washed the cloth everyday to earn him the school fees, the bruises in the mother's hand is the price that the mother paid for his graduation and academic excellence and probably his future.


 
After finishing the cleaning of his mother hand, the youth quietly cleaned all remaining clothes for his mother. That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.


 
Next morning, the youth went to the director's office.
The director noticed the tear in the youth's eye, asked: “Can you tell what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"
The youth answered, " I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes'
The director asked, “please tell me your feeling."


 
The youth said :
Number 1, I knew what is appreciation, without my mother, there would not the successful me today.
Number 2, I knew how to work together with my mother, then only I can realize how difficult and tough to get something done.
Number 3, I knew the importance and value of family relationship.
The director said, " This is what I am asking, I want to recruit a person that can appreciate the help of other, a person that knew the suffering of others to get thing done, and a person that would not put money as his only goal in life to be my manager. You are hired.


 
Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates, every employees worked diligently and in a team, the company's result improved tremendously.

A child who had been protected and habitually given whatever he did, he developed "entitlement mentality" and always put himself first. He is ignorant of his parent's effort. When he started work, he assumed every people must listen to him, and when he became a manager, he would never know how suffering his employee and always blame others.  For this kind of people, he can have good result, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement, he will grumble and full of hatred and fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parent, did we love the kid or destroy the kid?
 

You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plate and bowl together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them in a right way.  You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow grey, same as the mother of that young person.
 
The most important thing is your kid learn how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learn the ability to work with others to get things done.